the BEST thing i can do

i am so impressed in my little heart that the very best thing i can do

for my family, my husband and my friends is to pray.

sometimes i feel like i lack SO many things. time, for starters! then there's talents

and patients, love.  oh my.  this has been overwhelming me lately!
wanting to be so much more.  to do so much more for the
people i love.  and even branching out to people i don't know so well,
or at all.
but i can't.  at least not well.  i want to do things according to His will.
not my own.  but i can't.  UNLESS>>>
I SPEND TIME WITH HIM!
reflecting and reading His word. worshipping and soaking up His goodness.
tasting and SEEING that HE is GOOD!
this is where it starts.  not to say that spending time and having a walk with
Him makes things all perfect and peachy.  but He guides. He holds. He carries
our burdens.  do ya'll know that we were not designed to carry our own burdens?
He actually made us in such a way that we need HIM to take our burdens!  this is good news friends!  i get so excited and joy just bubbles up in me as a write this!
we have a mighty savior friends!
so, my point to all this...to encourage you to take that further step with me this day, this week, this year
and reach out for Him.  if you have not made a commitment to nurture your relationship
with God in a deeper way and let Him take all those burdens you weren't
even meant to carry in the first place, make time for Him.  He loves you so!

i prefer the early hours of the morning. i make a steamy cup of tea and wrap myself in a blanky.
stare out the window and breath deep.  pray.  plead.  read. savor.
 the best advice i could give a mama is
to try to wake up before the kiddos and spend that quiet time with Him and
the Bible.  let Him speak to your heart and lay it all out at His feet.  He's waiting for you.

Goals

so, i don't usually use the term "new years resolution" for some reason. 

i tend to stick to the simple word "goals". 

and the way i usually arrive at the ideas for my goals is through

reflection from the previous year, prayer, and having my eyes 

opened to some random things that just plain stink in this home (or more likely this heart!) 

and need to change.  change does not come over night darn it!
i am trying to learn that the fact is that these goals
in life need to be cultivated, practiced and prayed over.  lately i have been asking
God to give me a heart of conviction.  not for any one thing, but for many
things.  that i would be a woman who would stand stronger for Him and trust
Him with everything.
i have to apologize for writing so all over the place.  i am used to journaling for only myself
where it's okay that things are scattered and make no sense to anyone else!
here's a few pics of these sweet people God has given me to serve...

okay, this last one was to make you laugh.


here goes...some of my thoughts and goals for the year

Spiritual:

-Continuing to make my morning quiet/devotion time a priority

-Digging deeper into the Bible with Conviction

-Intercessory prayer

-Praying with more people right there on the spot!  Let's do it not just say we are going to!

-Be about a million times better example of Jesus to my kids 

-Learn more about Him so I can share more about Him

-Love with Christlike love -- deep and perfect and true -- void of my ugly self

-Empty to fill

-There is always so much in this area. i could go on and on!

- Read more good books

Physical:

-Continue working out 5 days a week (i do understand this may sound extreme, but i promise it's not!  i have a very devoted workout partner who works out with me and we just love starting our days super early with a workout. and it helps me stay on a good schedule to just do it all week instead of intermittently throughout the week.)

-Add in the elliptical 2-3 time per week (I saved up for one and it should be here soon!  i have always wanted one!)

-I have gone without sugar since the new year.  wow.  that's all i have to say.

-I have gone without white flour too.

-To not eventually freak out from not having white sugar and flour (it's my life dream to be able to say NO to these two awful things!)

-Get outside more

-Juice once a day

Mothering/Homeschool/Wife:

-Love on them more more more hold tight and soak up every moment

-Softer tones

-More consistant disciplining with love of course

-Take it slow

-Plan better for more fun activities and projects that will be remembered

-Show them Jesus 

-MORE DATES with husband  Shooting for 2 a month! we've gone years at a time without a date so this will be quite a feat but our marriage depends on it!

-Be very attentive to husbands needs and show lots of love  

-Pray and Pray and Pray for the wisdom and strength to care for my family the way they deserve!!!!!

Fresh Start!

i love reflection.  it does so much for my heart.  for my walk with God.  for my relationships.  after this holiday season, which was pretty chill thankfully, i am in total reflective mode as i go into this next year.  we are calming life down and getting back into the swing of school and normal bedtimes and it feels very nice and cozy around here.  i feel so blessed to live in the country, where i seldom go into town, and when i do it's usually just to grocery shop and head back home again.  it has made it so much easier for me not to be affected by all the hype of Christmas.  the little i do see makes me sick to my stomach and yearn for the world to know that Jesus wants so much more for us than to be such obsessive, miserable, materialistic self seeking beings.  i rest in that He has guarded my little families hearts to all this garbage and we usually have a quiet and simple holiday season spent with family, minimal decor and gifts, yet we have such a great time! i don't mean to sound negative at all, as i understand that most people absolutely love Christmas, but i personally struggle with this holiday and all that it entails on a worldly level. 

even with this season coming to an end in pains me to take down these reminders in my home 

of His entrance into this world.  so i won't.  they'll stay a while. :)

yes, this is our thankful tree, and yes, it's still up.  i can't bear to take it down just yet.  

it brings my heart joy!

what's on my heart today, more than anything, is just my simple need for Jesus.

without Him, i just can't. 

i'm excited to lean on HIM more this year!

I'll be back tomorrow with some of my personal goals and family goals for the year!

why bother with homemade bread?

bread set to rise!

this seems to be one of the most common question that i am asked about my bread making 

next to "how do you get it to turn out?".  these are both excellent questions actually.  i hope i have some some sort of sensible answers for both, but will just address the "why bother" today.
i've been making my bread consistently for about 4 years now and we never tire of it's goodness.  

we are very fortunate to not struggle with any gluten allergies in our family either! yet, i don't feel like we over do it on bread just because it doesn't bother our system.  I am especially careful not to eat to much! yikes!  i think it's important to understand that flour begins to oxidize immediately after being ground and therefore looses much of it's nutrients by the time you are scooping it out of the bag to make your bread. i know, what a stinkin' bummer right?  i was so sad when i found this out!  that is when i began researching flour mills and grinding fresh grains.  then came the next bummer.  these babies are expensive!  well, i got my husband to agree to buy me one if i made bread for two months straight and showed him i was committed (he kinda thought it might be a fad or something).  we never looked back and i got my mill!  i am so thankful for my sweet mill!  it is well used!  i wish i could buy one for everyone out there, but ya'll might have to go asking your husbands and promising fresh bread forever!  they might just say YES!  anywho, when you grind them beautiful grains up fresh you get yourself bread that is full of nutrients and goodness!  i know a mill might not be a realistic purchase for

some people, which is understandable, i'm just trying to explain my conviction for making the leap to get one myself.  so that is one reason for making bread at home, and the next is that you can make organic bread with only 5 ingredients for WAY less than you could EVER buy in a store EVER. PERIOD!  i haven't done the math for a while but it's something ridiculous!  money saving is always welcome here!  crazy grocery bills up in this home!

we built that counter just for the mill.  hehe.

here's another appliance that helps with massive bread production.  it's the Bosch mixer.  no it's not cute.  or vintage like a kitchen aid, i know.  i have had friends actually tell me they wouldn't want one

because of this.  but i love it anyway and would recommend it to anyone looking into making a mixer purchase.  it outperforms a kitchen aid like you wouldn't believe (no offense super cute-comes in every color of the rainbow kitchen aids out there).  i really look forward to posting more about how i get my bread to turn out (i promise it can for you too!) , my super simple recipe, and how i keep up with bread making!

    

pumpkin spice latte anyone?

i mentioned this recipe yesterday and really wanted to share it!  it is so good!  if you are anything like me, i am always looking for healthy versions of tasty things.  i have only had 2 pumpkin spice lattes in my life.  the first made me very nauseated after i was done because it was so hard core sweet and the second i got with only 2 pumps of syrup instead of 4 and it was just ok to me.  i know there is a craze about these lattes for some out there, and i think this one hits the spot!

so, here is what you need...oops i forgot to put the soymilk in the pic too, you'll need your fave milk of choice.

brew up your favorite coffee in your french press (make it a full batch k)
truth be told, i don't know how to explain this recipe for a single serving.  sorry. hopefully you'll have someone to share with cuz this makes about 3-4 good size cups and is really best when drank fresh.

measure about 2-3 tablespoons of canned pumpkin into your blender.  

then add about 3/4 teaspoon of pumpkin spice.  i use this because it has a good proportion of the spices, but if you don't have this you need to figure out how much cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger and cloves you would like to add.  

i like to use agave or sucanat as my sweetener.  put in about 3-4 tablespoons depending on how sweet you like yours.  you can always add more later too if it's not sweet enough.  

then add about 1/2 cup of your brewed coffee and blend till smooth.

next, pour your blended mixture into a container (i use a large 1/2 gallon jar) and then pour in the rest of your fresh coffee and stir well.  i like to add my soymilk right into the whole mixture but you can of course add it on a cup to cup basis.  by the time you have done all this the coffee may not be so hot anymore so you may need to microwave it for a sec to get it all steamy again.  it's a process, but it's so yummy!  i hope you enjoy!

rainy monday

 it's a beautiful and cozy rainy day here and we are enjoying every second!  it hasn't rained in so very long!  we busted our rears trying to get the outside of our house scraped, sanded and primed before this rain!  we almost finished, but not quite.  boy was i glad to be done at sundown yesterday! way too much work for one sunday, that's for sure!  

this morning started off great with my usual workout with my 2 fantastic girlfriends at 5:15. my sweet friend made us her delicious pumpkin spice latte to go after our workout (which i will HAVE to give share her recipe cuz it's crazy good!).   then it was home for some quiet worship time and the start of a busy monday.  

                                   

we love tea!

bad, bad lighting! rainy day and quickly taken phone pics may not be the best choice. i know right?

everything is more cozy when it's raining!

i did some fall decorating this last week.  i don't have a whole lot, but it works.  so fun!  i am in love with fall.  i think we all are.

i love to decorate with my boy's art. isn't this windy leaf pile awesome?

happy pumpkin!  LOVE those colors together.

the little plant in the owl may or may not be dried up and dead.  i'm not telling.

the boys love this little heirloom from their late great grandmother Mimi.  i'm always busting them cuz i find those sucker wrappers in their pockets!  i guess that is what happens when any sort of candy is left out.  like the bag of candy corn last week that lasted 1 1/2 days.  ridiculous.

that pumpkin hanging thing is a lot cuter in person or maybe i just really need to pick up the nikon to get a good pic.

owls are cute.

 ok, so at least THAT plant is alive.  :)

i hope u have a blessed monday!

i think i may end up to be a terrible blogger!

wow, it's like i think i want to blog and it sounds so fun to journal through the internet, but dang, you really have to make some time for this stuff! and i clearly have not!  heck, i don't even know who will read this!  i guess i have the hope that maybe some of the women whos blogs i truly enjoy will maybe enjoy and relate to my (non-existant) blog too.  i guess that's the point right? am i right? i don't even know!  i am a terrible commenter on others blogs because of time constraints (hence the fact that i cant seem to commit to my own!), but have been SO blessed by a select few blogs and i know i really need to let these girlies know!  anywho, i shall try...
let me share how the Lord has blessed us these last 7 weeks of school!  it's been hard and beautiful and trying and we are learning through it all.  i have three sons 10,8, and 6.  i really struggle to parent my very difficult middle babe.  he seems impossible sometimes.  i get depressed.  i get angry.  i cry.  and i do my very best to surrender this (and my sweet little boy) to Jesus.  and it's still hard.  all i want is to see him have peace and desire to obey and not be SO selfish.  it makes all our lives so so so hard some days that my head will truly THROB and ACHE from the stress.  i KNOW that he is in God's hands, but i fear that i don't have what it takes to be his mama and then my heart breaks and grieves over my shortcomings.  i KNOW i am in God's hands.  He holds me.  He loves me and little dude too.  so, this is on my heart right now.  this is what i am struggling with on a daily basis.  God is so faithful and i know that through prayer, fasting and the Holy Spirit in me i will be able to accomplish the precious tasks before me.

Praise the Lord! Give thanks to the Lord, for He is GOOD; His LOVE endures forever!
                                                                                                        Psalms 106:1
 

i love this guy.  i am so thankful for him. and i know that with God's grace and help i can do this!